Terrorism has been a part of daily life in Israel for so long, that Israelis -- both young and old -- seem to be constantly on the alert, living on edge. The second Palestinian uprising, or intifada, which began end of September 2000, has only exacerbated the prevailing tensions in society, as Palestinian terrorists routinely target public bus services, shopping malls and family restaurants, resulting in a mounting death toll among Israelis aged 16 and less.

Not surprisingly, say the experts, Israeli children tend to view the world with more caution than their Diaspora counterparts.

Expert Opinions

Gafnit Aghassy, a clinical psychologist at the Israel Center for the Treatment of Psychotrauma at Jerusalem's Sarah Herzog Hospital, says that children around the country are suffering from terrorism-related anxieties.
"We've received dozens and dozens of phone calls from parents and teachers trying to deal with traumatized children since the start of the intifada," Aghassy says. Aghassy also says that a significant number have problems sleeping, are reluctant to go to school, venture into town, or even ride a bus.

Holly Shaw, a New York trauma specialist who has been working almost non-stop since the September 11 attacks, says that Israelis, including children, are often in a state of hyper-alertness. Shaw, a frequent visitor to Israel, explains that, unlike conventional military actions, which tend to have a definable beginning, middle and end, "terrorism causes a hyper-vigilance that is both uncomfortable and unhealthy." Children "generally don't have the information that would help them deal with their fears. Parents try to protect their children by withholding information, but this often makes the children even more fearful," she explains.

Dr. Danny Brom, director of Herzog Hospital's psychotrauma center, explains that terrorism "forces a change in our mental map." It works by partitioning off "unsafe" areas :
- Just as many American Jews no longer visit Israel, "some people in Tel Aviv won't come to Jerusalem.
- Some Jerusalemites won't visit the Old City or Gilo at night.
- In places like Gilo, which has been targeted by Palestinian snipers, families feel that even their homes aren't safe.
- It gets to a point where families say, 'my living room is dangerous, because it faces [the Arab neighborhood of] Beit Jala, but my bedroom is okay,' "

Shaw says that, from a psychological perspective, being in school lessens the fear for both children and parents. In school, she says, the children have a structure. "They're not at home, exposed to the violent images on the TV screen. When the scenes are as graphic as the ones that are replayed over and over on the news, it's considered an exposure to the event. It's almost like being there."

The New York therapist says that when a family venue is targeted by terrorists, children feel particularly threatened. This was true after terrorists blew up the Sbarro pizzeria in Jerusalem this past summer, an attack that killed several children. In Shaw's view, even children who had never been anywhere near a terrorist attack were shaken by the Sbarro bombing, not only because they empathized with the child victims -- the news showed baby strollers in the wreckage -- but because a place they always equated with safety had suddenly become a site of terror.
"For kids, eating pizza is a ritual. The pizzeria is the place where families go to have fun. Suddenly, even the most familiar places seem vulnerable."

Children Express Anxiety

* Yehudit, a Jerusalem mother of four, says about her 9 year-old son, Ari: "He's afraid to go on class trip, to go out to the mall or the local burger king. If anything, his fears have grown progressively worse since the spate of suicide attacks in March. He's been having nightmares of being blown up, and now insists on crawling into bed with me." Yehudit's other children have been hardly less affected. "My 11 year-old refuses to listen to the radio news while we are driving the car. It scares him. My eldest son, who is thirteen, is annoyed when I won't allow him to go out to a movie with friends. At the same time, he understands that the danger is real." Rather than put on the news at home, Yehudit gets most of her news by logging on to the Internet, because she feels this protects her children from anxiety.

* Naomi is a 14-year old Jerusalemite. According to her mother, Naomi was a laid back, easy-going kind of kid until the start of the intifada. Since then, Naomi has been on the lookout for suicide bombers during trips to the city center, the Old City or the mall.
"Sometimes when I go to town I look around to see if people look suspicious… Terrorists usually tie bombs round their stomachs" , says Naomi, sitting on a sofa in her family's living room. Though she continues to frequent her favorite eateries and goes to the movies, Naomi gets nervous for their safety when her parents go out at night.
"I get worried when they go to weddings outside Jerusalem. The Arabs could shoot at their car."

American Jewish Educators Share Experience

This anxiety is a feeling of which a growing number of American educators are becoming painfully aware.

Since the September 11th attacks in the U.S., American educators have been grappling with how to best help their young charges with their questions and concerns. Robert Cohen, educational director of the Bay Terrace Jewish Center in Bayside, N.Y., says he felt compelled to address the attacks on three fronts: first, what it meant to the United States; second, what it meant to the American Jewish community; and third, what it meant for Israel.

"The kids were asking why it happened and what did it mean. A couple of the older kids had heard that Israel was being blamed and they wanted to talk about it", says Cohen, whose Hebrew school runs from grade 3 through high school. Cohen says that his students felt a change in atmosphere immediately after the tragedy.
"We had heightened security, with police stationed outside the synagogue during the high holidays. Some synagogues had their own guards posted inside the building. It was clear to them that the Jewish community was affected."

When discussing Israel, the education director brought along the front page of the "New York Jewish Week". "The headline read 'America, the New Israel.' it was marvelous for educational purposes. it explained that Israel has been dealing with this since its conception and now it's arrived on our doorstep. The kids really connected", Cohen says.

The attack heightened the students' awareness of anti-Semitism, Cohen believes. "They need to know that it exists, that the attack basically brought out the worst characteristics of some people." Yet at the same time, he stresses, teachers have tried to reassure the kids that most people in the world are good, and that they are safe.

Experts agree that reassurance is the best defense against trauma, and that parents have a vital role to play.

How to Help Children Cope

In Holly Shaw's view, the best way for parents to help their children cope is by working through their own fears.
"Remember the caveat on airplanes? Parents should first fasten an oxygen mask on themselves before assisting a child. Children cannot be adequately cared for and experience a sense of safety if the adults around them are panicky and extremely anxious. Parents need to take care of their own needs to provide children what they need. Parents need to monitor what kids are doing, seeing, watching. They need to explain that the event isn't ongoing," she says.

Recently, a five-year-old in New York asked Shaw, "When are they going to stop sending the plane into the building?" and "Why do they keep bombing it over and over again?"
Another said, "did you hear what happened? the whole town fell down." He didn't realize that only a few buildings had collapsed.

"Not all stress is bad. Small amounts of predictable, manageable stress can lead to resilience, which is the ability to thrive rather than to cave in to diversity. Kids ought to be told they can rise above and learn some important lessons about strength, courage and tenacity."

Realizing that unexpressed fear merely intensifies over time, Dr. Brom held a series of teacher-training workshops that taught educators how to discuss violence with their students. The idea was, Brom says, "to enable the teachers and ultimately the children to take one step back from the trauma, and not to react automatically."

During one especially difficult time in the country, security-wise, groups of high school students were asked to describe the worst event of the past month. Brom recalls that, "to the students' surprise, different kids picked different events. It was quite a discovery for the kids to realize that the world is subjective. Just discussing why they chose one thing over another diffused some of the raw fear. This classroom became a place where teachers and students felt free to explore different responses."

In moderation, talking about violence can also provide some perspective, Brom adds. "Some teachers asked their students to interview their grandparents, asking them if the current security situation reminds them of past experiences. Invariably, the grandparents described this war or that war and said, 'We've been here before. This isn't all that different, and it will pass.' "

Points to Ponder

1. The number of victims aged 16 and under in terrorist attacks in Israel has been rising. [See from Jun 2001 on http://www.mfa.gov.il/mfa/go.asp?MFAH0ia50]

• Were you aware of this?
• How can you make this point in Israel's case?

2. Children are often the most vulnerable to acts of terror - by secondary exposure through the media, peer group discussion.

• You can join a support scheme for victims' families, irrespective of where you live. http://www.jajz-ed.org.il/hasbara/headlines/solidarity.html#sites.

3. Suicide attacks and acts of terror are no longer solely an Israeli problem.

• How can you put this point over? http://www.jajz-ed.org.il/hasbara/headlines/rr.html#states

4. Dr. Shaw uses the analogy of the oxygen mask to demonstrate how parents should deal with their own fears first, then help children.

• What ideas do you recommend?

5. How do you control the level of "manageable stress"?!